Be yourself or someone else? TrueStoryXD

Assalamualaikum wr. wb..

Slamat pagi smua.. dah lama gak update..(pasti itu kata2 pembuka nya)..
sory2, akhir  akhir ini saya disibukkan dengan jadwal kuliah yg padat dari senin ke seninnya lagi...
karna status saya udah gk siswa lagi, tapi udah naik jadi MAHAsiswa,, yang otomatis tingkat kepadatan schedulenya udah ke level MAHA (super padat). atau mungkin ke hal lain, seperti tidur, udah maHAAAAhuaaaHAAH..(nguap, krna bgadang gak tidur #wkwkwk ->garink), mkanan udah pada MAHAaL, krna nutupin buat beli ini itu,(ex:buku, fotokopi,speaker, beli keperluan (maklum anak baru, status dompet rada gak jlas, kadang tebel kadang tipis.#tebal-->baru dpt kiriman(expired for 7 days)..

Sebagai seorang mahasiswa saya sudah seharusnya pandai memanagemen waktu dgn baik, mengatur diri, "adapt to new environments" (karna ini udah masuk bulan ke 3, yang bisa dibilang udah lumayan lama lo disini men. 3 bulan bukan waktu yang cepat, 1 bulan aja anggap ada 30 hari, dikalikan jadi 90 hari. trus 1 hari ada 24 jam , 1 jam ada 60 menit dan 1 menit ada 3600 detik.. bayangkan udah berapa detik aku berada disini bersama lingkungan yang baru.. masak dalam waktu tersebut saya masih belum bisa menyesuaikan diri. menurut agan agan, 3 bulan itu waktu yang cepat atau lama?

Banyak yang bilang adaptasi itu membutuhkan waktu, bisa cepat bisa lama atau malah gak bisa..dan itu tergantung orang nya .tapi satu yang saya rasakan disini, dan yang jelas pergaulan tiap orang itu semakin hari makin bertambah, karna ttiap hari manusia di"harus"kan bertemu dengan orang2 lain, bertemu dengan orang2 baru. mengenal karakter2 yang berbeda.

"Pergaulan terkadang memaksakan seseorang untuk tidak menjadi dirinya sendiri, karna MUNGKIN, bila ia menjadi dirinya sendiri ia mungkin tidak diterima dalam masyarakat.."

#kok serius gitu bacanya? nyantai aja kali... hehee...
kaget ya liat si iqbal jaiz bisa srius? ckckck, maklum sperti yang telah saya ceritakan tadi , pergaulan terkadang memaksakan seseorang untuk tidak menjadi dirinya sendiri, karna MUNGKIN, bila ia menjadi dirinya sendiri ia mungkin tidak diterima dalam masyarakat..

Sbg contoh, org yg dulunya gokil, bisa dibilang lucu, humoris, bocor
tapi saat dia masuk dalam lingkungan baru yang sebelumnya ia tak mengetahui karakter2 didalamnya, ia terpaksa menjadi orang lain, kalem, jaim, brusaha memulai percakapan2 baru yang kadang terdengar formal sperti menanyakan identitas, asal dsb. (karna tak mungkin membawa karakter nya yang bocor ke lingkungan barunya), dan sebagian orang di tahap ini banyak yang stuck karna bingung membawa diri.

"Dia bingung bagaimana memulai dirinya dengan karakter aslinya,

Agak lebay sih ngebayanginnya, tapi itu lah realita. Ada sebagian orang (sebagian besar) yang cepat beradaptasi dan kemudian menggunakan karakter aslinya. dan ada sebagian kecil (mungkin termasuk saya) yang harus menjalani peradaptasian dengan tidak menjadi dirinya sendiri, (karna mungkin susah) , Jaim, stay cool, (#lebih terlihat cuek ) dan ia membutuhkan waktu untuk mengenal lingkungan.

Dan semua itu membutuhkan WAKTU.
Jangan terkejut kalau orang yang didekat anda (atau disamping anda), bukan dia yang sebenarnya.

Believe it or not.. :D
Keep update on iqbalsullivan6661.blogspot.com . Keep smile and spirit, but dont be smile smile sendiri, coz ntar dikira orang gila.. :D
seperti ini..

atau ini...

ni ente yg lagi baca iqbalsullivan6661.blogspot.com..

*srius amat gan?

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Struggle for the Future #Chapter1

malam semua.
slam sejah tera untuk kita semua.


gimana kabar kalian ni para pembaca setia blog iqbaljaizdotkomers?(wkakaka, ngarep). sehat2 aja kan, gimana kuliah nya, udah pada jelas blom pada kemana? atau yg baru masuk sd, smp atau sma? atau yg baru naik kelas?.(sok akrab.com)


Congrats aja dh buat semua nya yg lagi menjalani persekolahan, TS cuma bisa mendoakan kalian dari sini, sukses aja lah. rajin2 balajar. karna kalian lah yg menjalani hidup kalian sendiri. *tumben..haha

sekedar kabar, bahwa TS kalian yg baik hati dan tidak sombong ini (amin)... alhamdulillah masa dpan nya udah jelas (maksudnya setapak lebih maju untuk masa dpan yg cerah (doain aja dh,hehe)  udah ktrima di ukm.(universiti kebangsaan malaysia) setelah melalui proses panjang pelik rumit dan berbelit menghadapi ratusan bahkan ribuan pesserta dari seluruh dunia.(baik dunia nyata, maupun dunia maya,)..ahahahaa


becanda gan..
sbenernya pserta nya cuma dari riau .... dan emg hanya dari riau.. (karena tesnya emg untuk anak2 riau).
--"
singkat cerita> SAYA MENGKUTI TES KEMITRAAN PROPINSI
udah jelas kan??
blom??


ckckck
biar lbih jelas > tekan tombol X di sudut kanan atas.


ahaha, stress
ya alhamdulillah sya ketrima,
tapi
(dibalik cerita bahagia, pasti ada crita sedih)
sayangnya.. dan sdikit kcewa
saya tidak lulus untuk yg beasiswa nya,,
sedih pastinya,, tp mau gimana lg


beasiswa hanya diberikan untuk 15 org dari seluruh anak riau..
*sadis x bacanya nya ya.
ok ralat#
beasiswa hanya diberikan untuk 15 org dari 22 peserta tes kemitraan
dan saya termasuk dari 7 org yg tidak dapat trsebut.


sedih,, haru.pilu...sampai2 seorang tman saya yg tidak lulus membuat pernyataan*nama disamarkan


K**********=mending aku cpat2 lulus dh, ga dihargai x usaha aku.


___


tp aku ttap bersyukur sma Allah swt. krna masih dberi ksempatan kuliah. aplgi di luar negeri.


****

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Not Ready to Die - Avenged Sevenfold

Gone cast away in time
Evil yours, now evil mine
So i robbed you blind, the voices
In my head could jest a less than
Peaceful side

The endless possibilities
Controlling every fight

You can't break me, crushed the
fears of yesterday
You can't change me, barriers our trust will fade.

I've stood in the dark, been
waiting all this time
While we damn the dead i'm
trying to survive, i'm not ready to die

Damned, watch the masses fall
burn it down, control 'em all
Make me crawl, to daddy's little
girl to read the writings on the wall

While cast into the nothingness
the final curtain call

You can't break me, crushed the
Fears of yesterday
You can't change me, barriers our trust will fade.
I've stood in the dark, been waiting all this time
while we damn the dead i'm
trying to survive, i'm not ready to die

Through the madness we find
loyalty is no match for power
Save your body or lie, left to rot in
your darkest hour
friends won't help you now as long as your mine

You can't break me, crushed the
fears of yesterday
You can't change me, barriers our trust will fade.

I've stood in the dark, been
waiting all this time
While we damn the dead i'm
trying to survive

And i'll control the world one
person at a time
As i damn the dead i'm trying to
survive, i'm not ready to die

oh!

I'm not ready to die
I'm not ready to die !!
I'm not ready to die !!
I'm not ready to die !!!!

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Burn It All - Avenged Sevenfold

Run away
I'm living with a hole inside
A piece of me I am yet to find
The edge of reason, Lies uneven
Turn me off, feel the blood so cold

It's like a product that was bought in salt
Asking me for the impossible

I ain't waiting for a miracle
I ain't waiting for the world to change
Under my skin lives the reason
Under my armor I've lost it all

No more pain
No saviour made of born design
Fool me before I tell ya not this time
Rape my body, Lost my vision, Lost my mind
I had to let it go

Another day living irrational
Another day inside this dying soul

I ain't waiting for a miracle
I ain't waiting for the world to change
Under my skin lives the reason
Under my armor I've lost it all

There's something in your eyes
A part of me that I recognise
I want to let you know
We'd be there if we could and it's alright
You taught me how to feel
It's no wonder I'd do anything
Tell me why'd you have to go
With the ones that come last are the best I know
At time, It seems that we've lost it all

Burn it all
Burn it to the fucking ground
Believe the words that I don't want me around
Life with vision, need decision
World collision and heads will roll
With nothing left but the pain to show
Mental imagery on the floor

I ain't waiting for a miracle
I ain't waiting for the world to change
Under my skin lives the reason
Under my armor I've lost it all

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Dear God - Avenged Sevenfold

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love purpose hard to find
While I recall all the words you spoke to me
Can't help but wish that I was there
Back where I'd love to be, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold her when I'm not around,
when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
’Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

There's nothing here for me on this barren road
There's no one here while the city sleeps
and all the shops are closed
Can't help but think of the times I've had with you
Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold her when I'm not around,
when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
’Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

Some search, never finding a way
Before long, they waste away
I found you, something told me to stay
I gave in, to selfish ways
And how I miss someone to hold
when hope begins to fade...

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love purpose hard to find

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold her when I'm not around,
when I'm much too far away
We all need the person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
’Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

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Critical Acclaim - Avenged Sevenfold

(Shh, quiet, might piss somebody off)
Like me motherfucker you’ve been at it for too long.
While you feed off all those insecurities, you stand in front of me and bite the hand that feeds.

Self righteousness is wearing thin (lies inside your head, your best friend)
I’ll bleed but not for fellow man (broken glass, your fake reflection)

Telling them it’s all for something real
Don’t respect the words your speaking
Gone too far
Acclaim

So, how does it feel to know that someone’s kid in the heart of America has blood
on their hands fighting to defend your rights so you can maintain the lifestyle
that insults his family’s existence
Well where I'm from we have a special salute waved high in the air towards
all those pompous assholes who spend their days pointing fingers.

Fuck you...

(Shh, quiet, might piss somebody off)
Like the heartbeat of this country when antagonized too long
I’ll be damned if you count me in as part of your generous hypocrisy; collected enemies.

Tabloid gossip we want less real (There’s no need for us to bury you)
Selfish agenda, once again (right this way, you dug your own grave)

Telling them it’s all for something real
Don’t respect the words your speaking
Gone too far
Acclaim

All the way from the east to the west we got this high society looking down
on their very foundation.
Constantly reminding us that our actions are the cause of all their problems.
Pointing their fingers in every direction.
Blaming their own nation for who wins elections.
They never contributed a fucking thing to the country they love to criticize.

Excuse the obscene
Ignore the untrue
Depictions we see
Try and get through
And many mistakes can hurt
I’m not the last, but I sure ain’t the first!

Self righteousness is wearing thin (lies inside your head, your best friend)
I’ll bleed but not for fellow man (broken glass, your fake reflection)

Telling them it’s all for something real
Don’t respect the words your speaking
Gone too far
Acclaim

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Almost Easy - Avenged Sevenfold

I feel insane every single time I'm asked to compromise
‘Cause I'm afraid and stuck in my ways and that’s the way it stays
So how long did I expect love to outweigh ignorance?
By that look on your face I may have forced the scale to tip

I'm not insane, I'm not insane
I'm not insane, I’m not... not insane
(Mother)
Come back to me it's almost easy
(Said it all)
Come back again it's almost easy

Shame pulses through my heart from the things I've done to you
It's hard to face but the fact remains that this is nothing new
I left you bound and tied with suicidal memories
Selfish beneath the skin but deep inside I'm not insane

I'm not insane, I'm not insane
I'm not insane, I’m not... not insane
(Mother)
Come back to me it's almost easy
(Said it all)
Come back again it's almost easy
(You’ll learn your lesson)

Come back to me it's almost easy
(But first you fall)
Come back again it's almost easy

Now that I've lost you it kills me to say
(Hurts to say)
I've tried to hold on as you've slowly slipped away
I'm losing the fight, I've treated you so wrong now let me make it right

(Make it alright)

I'm not insane, I'm not insane
I'm not insane, I’m not... not insane
(Mother)
Come back to me it's almost easy
(Said it all)
Come back again it's almost easy
(You’ll learn your lesson)
Come back to me it's almost easy
(But still you’ll fall)

Come back again it's almost easy

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Bat Country - Avenged Sevenfold

He who makes a beast out of himself
Gets rid of the pain of being a man

Caught here in a fiery blaze, won't lose my will to stay.

I tried to drive all through the night,
The heat stroke ridden weather, the barren empty sights.
No oasis here to see, the sand is singing deathless words to me.

Can't you help me as I'm startin' to burn (all alone).
Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction.
My confidence is leaving me on my own (all alone).
No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention.

As I adjust to my new sights the rarely tired lights will take me to new heights.
My hand is on the trigger I'm ready to ignite.
Tomorrow might not make it but everything's all right.
Mental fiction follows me; show me what it's like to be set free.

Can't you help me as I'm startin' to burn (all alone).
Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction.
My confidence is leaving me on my own (all alone).
No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention.

So sorry you're not here I've been sane too long my vision's so unclear.
Now take a trip with me but don't be surprised when things aren't what they seem.

Caught here in a fiery blaze, won't lose my will to stay.
These eyes won't see the same, after I flip today.

Sometimes I don't know why we'd rather live than die,
We look up towards the sky for answers to our lives.
We may get some solutions but more just pass us by,
Don't want your absolution cause I can't make it right.
I'll make a beast out of myself, gets rid of all the pain of being a man.

Can't you help me as I'm startin' to burn (all alone).
Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction.
My confidence is leaving me on my own (all alone).
No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention.

So sorry you're not here I've been sane too long my vision's so unclear.
Now take a trip with me but don't be surprised when things aren't what they seem.
I've known it from the start all these good ideas will tear your brain apart.
Scared but you can follow me I'm too weird to live but much too rare to die.

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Beast and The Harlot - Avenged Sevenfold

This shining city built of gold, a far cry from innocence
There's more than meets the eye round here look to the waters of the deep.
A city of evil

There sat a seven-headed beast, ten horns raised from his head
Symbolic woman sits on his thrown but hatred strips her and leaves her naked.
The Beast and the Harlot.

She's a dwelling place for demons, she's a cage for every unclean spirit every filthy bird
And makes us drink the poisoned wine to fornicating with our kings.
Fallen now is Babylon the Great.

The city dressed in jewels and gold, fine linen, Myrrh and pearls
Her plagues will come all at once as her mourners watch her burn.
Destroyed in an hour
Merchants and captains of the world, sailors navigators too
Will weep and mourn this loss with her sins piled to the sky
The Beast and the Harlot.

The day has come for all us sinners, if your not a servant you'll be struck to the ground.
Flee the burning, greedy city looking back on her to see there's nothin' around.
I don't believe in fairytales and no one wants to go to Hell, but we made the wrong decision
And it's easy to see. Now if you wanna serve above or be a king below with us your
Welcome to the city where your future is set forever.

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Seize the Day - Avenged Sevenfold

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry
These streets we travel on will undergo our same lost past

I found you here, now please just stay for a while
I can move on with you around
I hand you my mortal life, but will it be forever?
I'd do anything for a smile, holding you 'til our time is done
We both know the day will come, but I don't want to leave you

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry (a melody, a memory, or just one picture)

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

Newborn life replacing life, replacing all of us, changing this fable we live in
No longer needed here so where should we go?
Will you take a journey tonight, follow me past the walls of death?
But girl, what if there is no eternal life?

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry (a melody, a memory, or just one picture)

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over
Trails in life, questions of us existing here, don't wanna die alone without you there
Please tell me what we have is real

So, what if I never hold you, or kiss you lips again?
I never want to leave you and the memories for us to see
I beg don't leave me

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over
Trails in life, questions of us existing here, don't wanna die alone without you there
Please tell me what we have is real

(Silence you lost me, no chance for one more day)
I stand here alone
Falling away from you, no chance to get back home

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Burn It Down - Avenged Sevenfold

Jealousy's an ugly word, but you don't seem to care
Converse behind my back, but now I'm here
Need no one to comply with me though everyone that I defeat
Don't need you, fuck camaraderie, this rage will never go away

Hatred fuels my blood, I'll burn ya down (you can't help me)
One king to watch the horsemen fall, I'll fight 'til the end (I won't help you)
I can't trust anyone, see it in my eyes
Now I can understand, it's sorrow that feeds your lies

You're on my back when the water gets too deep for you to breath
A crutch for you that won't always be there
Hide in the dark another day, the fear in you is here to stay
So get the fuck away from me, and learn to trust the words I say.

Hatred fuels my blood, I'll burn ya down (you can't help me)
One king to watch the horsemen fall, I'll fight 'til the end (I won't help you)
I can't trust anyone, witness and see it in my eyes
Now I can understand, put faith in you for the last time
It's sorrow that feeds your lies

Run from me before I tear you down (be afraid)
You chose the wrong side (it feels so right)
I won't help you, let you rot away
Run towards the light exposing your soul (we won't be there by your side)
Salvation's dying (somebody's crying)
We're all gone in the end, sweet child we'll miss you
No, so far away

I can't trust anyone, witness and see it in my eyes
Now I can understand, put faith in you for the last time
It's sorrow that feeds your lies

Falling away, can't turn back time
Burn it down anyway

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Trashed And Scattered - Avenged Sevenfold

Keep on writing you're just raping yourself
(nothing can take my mind away from them)
Don't you ask about me, ask 'bout somebody else
(Once I've fallen there's many stories to tell)
I can feel it, won't embrace it, it's overwhelming how far you take it
(Stuck in a state of questioning)
And don't you tell me you know we're destined, you won't convince me, I won't listen
(Resentment building, you've put our lives on hold)

Trashed and scattered again, I'm feelin' so low
You waste your breath while fuckin' with me, my blood is so cold
My destination always unknown, I'll find my way there
But goddamn motherfuckers always wasting my time

I won't be the victim, but the first to cast a stone
Sedated nights to the bar room fights as metropolis takes its toll
And don't you try to stop me, it's a place you'll never know
Don't try to judge or take shots at me, I'll never let you seize control

Play your game you better walk away cause your integrity don't mean shit
Crawl on me you fucking parasite, and I'm gonna take you out

Label me, that's fine, I'll be somebody else (Nothing in front of me but holes ahead)
Lie about my life, have a story to tell (Lights went down, was on the edge and I fell)
Oh you're so insightful, let me remind you to twist and break me, should make you worried
(Long way to go and you're right there)
Two-faced liar, don't try and know me, deceit brings fire, makes sure you can't breathe
(Pick at pieces of my body below)

I never bothered with all the rumors, too much garbage (all the same)
(I know my destination)
I'll stand right here, come on you falsehood deceitful liar (There's no shame)
Don't ever take my side, I know you're never right, I'll justify the means (Nothing's what it seems)
I'll stand around and fight, but there's no point tonight, been chained to this machine

Trashed and scattered again, I'm feelin' so low
You waste your breath while fuckin' with me, my blood is so cold
My destination always is known, I'll find my way there
But Goddamn Imposter are you out of your mind?

I walk down these roads alone and now you're seen here
My feelings that I'm having towards you are perfectly clear (I control this ride)
My devils appetite is tonight and now I'm alright
But you Goddamn Motherfuckers always wasting my time

Play your game you better walk away cause your integrity don't mean shit
Crawl on me you fucking parasite, and I'm gonna take you out

I won't be the victim, but the first to cast a stone
Sedated nights to the bar room fights as metropolis takes its toll
And don't you try to stop me, it's a place you'll never know
Don't try to judge or take shots at me, I'll never let you seize control

Don' try and get the best of me (No one can help but your own self)
City makes my body ache (Lonely, don't try and prey on me)
I feel your world dying, no more use in tryin'

And my body's trashed and low, but to you I'll never show myself or what's inside
And I've seen it all before and I'll settle the score, I'll never join your side

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